Thought Experiment: Confessional Statement

I have a diverse approach to method and media when working and I tend to be brief led - so as to know what process would be best appropriate for the task. Although a varied skillset can be seen as a positive, I often find the lack of constraint, direction and consistency within my practice difficult to manage. I worry that without a visual signature and consistent body of work to match, I will not be able to realise my dream of becoming an illustrator, therefore hope to have another shot at tackling this problem this year. I am passionate about nature and its intricacies and beauty, traits of which I often try and emulate within my work. I enjoy the process and aesthetic of creating high detail and intricate pieces, no matter what the medium, which I would consider a strength of mine (despite the time it often takes). Over the past three years my self-confidence and the confidence I have in my ability and work - has been eaten away at by anxiety and I am often paralysed by the fear of failure when approaching any new piece. This fear has led me to avoid developing skills in all areas of my practice, from experimentation and media development through to ideas generation and create considered conceptual pieces. This year I am excited to lift the pressure I put on myself, take risks, have fun and not be afraid to fail or create “crap” work. I am also looking forward to finding an exciting direction and tone of voice for my practice.

Media processes I enjoy (but could always use more practice in…):

• Digital media (Photoshop, Illustrator)

• Print media (screen-print, lino cut)

• Paper cut, collage & craft

• Pen and ink

• Pencil, coloured pencil

• Paint (Watercolour, gouache)

Summary

• Reduce the pressure i put on myself

• Play and experiment this year - develop

• I have a diverse skillset - try to narrow down my practice focus / direction

• Interests: nature, landscape, world issues

• Aesthetics: detail, shape, colour, light, texture, atmospheric

• Aims: challenge views, educate & inform, convey deeper meaning, narrative

Approach for my visual response:

• Try a process I haven't tried in a while - that i'm "scared of"....digital?

• Consider colour! (argh scary scary!!)

• Keep in mind my short statement for the content

• Attempt to convey confusion and chaos of my practice - as this terrifies me!

• Remember to have fun and don't be afraid of imperfections and mistakes!

• Try to not spend forever on the outcome - this is not a final piece or a representation of how "good" I am!

Short Confessional Statement

The scariest thing for me is my anxiety and self-doubt. Together they feed, grow and stifle. I fear one day they will take over and engulf every sense of who I am completely and there will be nothing of me left.